Part 2: Becoming Metamorphic

6 Steps to proactively transform after shocks and stresses. An eight part series.

What will you become? Why leave it to fate, why not procreate your transformation?

Part 1 can be read by clicking here.

There is a natural process that can be used as a metaphor for our own transformation during times of stress and shock, and while we don’t exactly go through metamorphosis, where there are a number of actual physical and structural body changes at each stage (i.e. egg, larvae, pupa in a chrysalis to adult butterfly), we do exhibit a large number of the other qualities like behavioural change, new abilities, improvements and adaptations for new environments and this happens at many stages throughout our lives — this isn’t just improving, this is us going through a transformation.

This dynamic understanding of resilience as the capacity to persist, adapt and transform was the inspiration for Aaron Antonovsky’s Salutogenic approach to health. Rather than wait for symptoms to occur and then treat them, his method takes a preemptive and proactive approach to realise the potential for positive health. Antonovsky also recognised the importance of social cohesion and mutual support as important factors.

If you suddenly find yourself seriously bogged down, what are the most important things to have prepared? How do you deal with it in the moment and how do you react to it in the aftermath? How do you become metamorphic?

You first want to have built resilience so that you avoid collapse. This requires that your vital functions are operating at peak efficiency and that you have the right support network around you. So that if the boggy swamp you find yourself in gets deeper, murkier and more miserable, you have the mental and physical aptitude to persevere for longer than most others can. You then need the aptitude to transform based on new knowledge and being able to make the right decisions. And finally, you have to be able to do this repeatedly all your life — because we can’t escape entropy, no matter how hard humankind tries to control everything around us (in this sense, Taleb’s second point is on point).

What if I told you, you too could naturally transform after knocks and setbacks? This is my personally improved version of Taleb’s 6 steps to living in an unknowable future, or as I like to call it, How To Be Metamorphic. I am anchoring resiliency with emotional intelligence and suggest a more balanced well-being approach. It is based on my 40 years of learning from family, friends and mentors far more intelligent than me, from authors and leaders far more knowledgeable than I am and from ancestors far wiser than I can ever hope to become:

1. Learn how to maximise your self-healing capacity
2. Build community around you for support
3. Be adaptable — plan but create options in case your plan fails
4. Develop an open mindset to see opportunity
5. Learn new skills and apply them during times of transition
6. Get better at making decisions

To expand on these in some detail:

1. Self Heal (body and mind). You are an exceptional bit of kit, your body fixes and heals itself all the time, every second of the day. When it can’t, it is usually because there’s a glitch in its ability to self-heal due to things like chronic inflammation, bad communication between cells and a number of other source issues. You can counteract much of this by focusing on your:
   - Gut-Health: Read up all about your Microbiome — the Fungi and Bacteria that live in symbiosis with you account for more than you realise. You are what your bacteria digest — go organic and avoid food grown with chemicals that disrupt your body’s ability to function. Also give your gut a break, there are a huge number of benefits to intermittent fasting and occasional longer fasts.
   - Stress management: stress will take you down, learning how to deal with it yourself is key, so that you don’t trigger the flight or fight response when things get really hard — as that’s your body’s response to being overwhelmed
   - Check out TRE (tension releasing exercises) which will teach you in a few short lessons how to ‘shake’. It is a lifelong skill and easy to learn your body’s natural method of combating stress — it is not like your cave dwelling ancestors didn’t have a hard time too and we’ve evolved a method to deal with stress.
2. Figure out what your replenishing actions are (taking a bath, walks in nature, marvel at the beauty around you, take time alone, time with others, meditate, yoga, etc. And practice self-compassion. These are all easy wins.
3. Build Community around you. It has worked for 150,000 years of homo sapien’s existence and gets us through the hardest of hard times. Take any massive shock in history and see how communities rallied to overcome the problem together.
4. Adaptability — we all know about having all your eggs in one basket — if your basket gets dropped, your plans are scrambled. Having a back-up plan is good. Make plans, but when things change — which they inevitably will — be open to adapting the plan, in the start up world this is called ‘pivoting’.
   - Diversify your work! Try to create a mix of active and passive income streams. For most people our time is owned by someone if you work for them, so how can you create a side hustle that makes you money independent of whether you are there in person or not? For example, if you make an online course and post it online for people to take, it can generate an income even when you aren’t there.
   - Take into consideration the unintended consequences of your actions and don’t be selfish. If you have to let someone down, make sure it isn’t to their detriment if you’ve made previous agreements and explain to them why you’ve had to adapt.
5. Opportunity — this is a perspective; your perception and response to stressful events are what determine whether stress will cause you harm and whether you’ll find the positive within it. If you are overwhelmed, you’ll be incapable of seeing opportunity (see the first step), if you can see that the troubles we face are our lessons and in chaos is the opportunity, then you can take advantage of a situation rather than let it take control of you. Observe the spaces and the liminal, be inquisitive, that’s where we find ourselves seeing the adjacent possible. “The pandemic is a portal. We can walk through it with our dead ideas. Or we can walk lightly, ready to imagine another world.” - Arundhati Roy
6. Learning — it has compounded interest. One of the best investments of your time you’ll ever make is an investment in yourself. Because tomorrow, you’ll be that little bit more knowledgeable and more skilled once you’ve put it into practice. Most things you can learn online for free these days, information is everywhere so there’s very little excuse.
7. Decision Making — get better at it
   - Mental Models allow you to make better decisions by learning your biases and weak points. They won’t go away altogether but you’ll catch yourself more often than not until it becomes a habit.
   - Considered consumption — do I really need another (… glass of wine, beer, car, house, few hours on social media, netflix, etc.)?
   - Prioritise what you spend your time on and reduce the noise
   - Declutter so you can make better decisions. Try to be lighter, if you have to move, then you don’t want to drag useless stuff. Opportunities don’t wait for you.
   - Ownership of what’s important based on how much it improves your life; either aesthetically because it brings you great pleasure to use it or to look at it (aim for above 7 out of 10), or functionally (if you use something very infrequently, consider renting or sharing it).
   - Don’t wait till the last minute to decide to do something. This just leads to inaction and procrastination. Friedrich Nietzsche once said “If you have a why, you can bare any how”. Find your purpose in life and decide to do it; there’s nothing more motivating to get you through hardship than knowing that what you do tomorrow will be ultimately fulfilling.

I’m aiming to get better at being Metamorphic. It is a life skill I’m developing that gives me huge pleasure too. I genuinely get great satisfaction out of all of these steps. Life is NOT being fearful of fragility so that we avoid difficult circumstances; life is transforming each time we get a shock to our system and relishing the personal accomplishment of overcoming these hurdles. I also think Metamorphic sounds much cooler than being Antifragile. Let’s see if it catches on…

This is the introduction to the next six parts which will go into more details around each of the steps. Please let me know in the comments what this article made you think, if and where it triggered you or inspired you. I’m excited to share what I’ve learned, what I am trying to put into practice and I’d like to know what you’ve learned too.

I do not receive any money from any of the sources I’ve referenced throughout the article, they are merely starting points to guide you in your own research around the topics discussed. Clap if you’ve liked this and feel free to follow if you don’t want to miss my next article.

N.B. This article and the concept of being Metamorphic doesn’t take into consideration the difficulties for those who face racism, sexism, bigotry and injustice. These institutional and societal issues are abhorrent and I hope we’ll see a profoundly more equal society develop as a result of all the incredible work of activists around the world. How to be resilient in an unjust world is not something I am familiar with as I am fortunate enough to be a middle class white male (which is referred to as winning the ‘Ovarian Lottery’ by Warren Buffet). I can only offer my thoughts on coping with other shocks in life and I hope they can be a source of support for everyone.